Fashion show! Fashion show! Fashion show at lunch!

I figured now that I have a couple months to catch up, it would be a good time to get a haircut, as it has been about 8 months since the last one and my hair has been through its own Battle of Iwo Jima this year. I sprung for the fancy salon and went to Great Clips, where a gorgeous (seriously) Argentinian lady snipped away. I began by first apologizing for the hot mess that is my hair and explaining its recent history, and then she proceeded to give my hair disparaging looks while encouraging me to buy expensive reconstructive products. Um, did she not hear I stripped it on my own, an obvious sign that I am a cheapskate? That said, I am VERY happy with the cut and will be returning to Adelita at Great Clips on Rosedale. Fo' sho'.

The best part of the experience was eavesdropping on the conversation taking place to my right, as it included some girl describing all the "really cute" outfits she bought her niece. I couldn't see this Eleanor Roosevelt of the 21st century, but after hearing her shopping selections, I had an image in my mind. I will share with you some of her words and you can play the game as well.

1) Sorry boys, I only date rock stars
(Do you WANT your daughter on the "Rock of Love" bus? Dream big, o' little one.)
2) I'm with the MILF
(I will SLAP you, Courtney, if you ever purchase this for me and my pretend children, just for wasting your money.)
3) I love my daddy, even if he is a deabeat a**$#@!
(Make sure to dress the kid in this when the daddy drops by once a year to take the kid to the park for an hour. Nothing like a big pile of animosity to get the visit started right!)

There were a few more, but at this point my head was exploding with the shock and horror of it all. I was tempted to lean over and ask if she found one emblazoned with the message "In 20 years, taxpayers wll be supporting me and my 5 kids", as that would be super appropriate, but I am passive aggressive and that's just not my style. I'll just sit there and smirk to myself at the witty and hilarious things running through my head, then post it on my blog.

I realize that a picture of Britney Spears and the kids sharing a pack of smokes would have been more post-appropriate, but her image has already been used once on my blog, so I though I'd change it up. Nothing like Brooke Hogan in a pair of homemade denim chaps (What?! No bedazzled jewels?!?) to represent this particular sector of society.