Some covert action.

Mason and I went shopping for his prom shoes and tie today and had a MAJOR score on the Vans. We stopped by Macy's as well so I could buy some fancy-schmancy eyeliner at the MAC counter for about twice the regular price, but I had a gift card and I heard it was the best of the "affordable" options. (I love that magazines such as InStyle think MAC and Banana Republic are good for those "shopping on a budget.") Mason tried to not look like too much of a homosexual at the makeup counter while some bleach blonde gal rattled off about twenty different shades of black from which I could choose-I settled upon black.

We drove by Costco on the way home and Mason asked if I had a Costco card, as a polish dog and soda for $1.50 is cheap and delicious. No membership, but I did have a gift card and needed gas. I didn't want to wait for twenty cars, though, but fatty Mason said we should still attempt to get in the store and I could try an "I forgot my card" line-we're hardcore and decided to go for it. Turns out all I had to do was open my wallet and simply pretend to look through it for the doorman to grant us entrance. Victory! Spicy mustard was in my near future.

Not only was the polish dog and pink lemonade (with a touch of Sprite) as good as ever, I commented to Mason that the fact that we got something we weren't supposed to made it just that much better-he agreed. Hmmmm, maybe proponents of legalizing marijuana based on the argument that a lot of kids do it just because it is illegal are onto something.

9. This was NOT intended.

My friend's birthday was last week, and usually I bring my A-game when it comes to selecting the perfect gift for such things. However, my creativity has been severely depleted due to my need for it in the planning of Prom and organizing the school blood drive. Thus, I found myself at Target/my Mecca buying her a gift card-lame. I decided to add a personal touch with a book and settled upon Tori Spelling's autobiography; you know, real hard-hitting journalism. Of course I flipped through it when I got home, and soon browsing had turned into perusing. And that's how I found myself up until 2am engrossed in the sordid tale of Tori's privileged upbringing, drama on the set of "90210" (I was never allowed to watch it but I don't feel that deprived), her first failed marriage, finding new love (with a married man-scandalous!), etc. And you better believe I wrapped it up nicely (that truly is my favorite part of the gift-giving process) and am giving it to her tonight at the birthday soiree.

During my shopping excursion I was looking at office supplies (hold on, it gets better) and saw a body appear, then quickly disappear, at the end of the aisle, followed by a yelp of "I don't want to see her!" What the what? Of course I investigated and found three of my students. Apparently kids think it awkward to see teachers out of their natural habitat and, of the three, only Carissa was being normal and conversing with me like a human being, while Jeff and Rudy tried to avoid eye contact. Jeff then shared that he had seen me looking through the books and quickly turned the other way, as he didn't want me to see him "dressed like this." First off, there was nothing wrong with his ensemble (I was looking hot-to-trot in my gym clothes); and second, if one is as smart as this kid, who cares what you're wearing? While I do enjoy the world o' fashion and find great joy in piecing together outfits for the work and fun times, others don't, and that's cool. I only judge girls who wear Uggs paired with miniskirts and boys who don the Skin and Metal Mulisha brands.

I can recommend sTORI TELLING (props on the title) for those looking for a quick and painless beach read; but not for those looking to nourish their mind, body, and soul. I am thinking of atoning for this by checking out The Snowball: Warren Buffett and the Business of Life. My students and I recently read and discussed excerpts from his annual letter to Berkshire Hathaway stockholders, and he is just good stuff. Did you know he has lived in the same home for the past 50 years and that he has a company jet he named "The Indefensible"? Fun facts...

Skanks.

So I was looking at all of the family's posts yesterday and noticed that the heading for mine included drug usage, while Courtney's included the word "ho". I mentioned this to my mom, saying that she must be so proud of her daughters; she laughed and gave me one of her reprimanding looks. Fast forward to today when she admittd that she didn't really get Courtney's ("Idaho...No Udaho") until she said it aloud, and that the pride was just swelling inside. I thought I'd change it up for Mom's sake. Your turn now, Shnee.

I need the good drugs.

Life has been crazy: B-A-N-A-N-A-S! Teaching economics during a recession is draining, as I am constantly reading and studying every news source out there, trying to stay abreast of the sitution so that my students don't think their teacher is an ignoramous who should be pink-slipped. Although my workload has increased quite a bit, though, it's exciting to be teaching a subject that is extremely relevant and that allows for awesome discussions. I can honestly say that, as of now, I am loving my job...although Friday you couldn't tell, as I was on the verge of throwing desks, as 3rd quarter grades closed and everyone and their mother needed to make up tests at the last minute and give me a billion excuses as to why/how they lost their extra credit papers.

My second endeavour that is monopolizing my time is planning the prom. The theme is Alice in Wonderland and is going to be quite bomb-diggity. I am the class advisor and should really just be overseeing things, but I have control issues with how things should look and took on the task of designing the tickets and posters to advertise the event. (I think I should be a graphic designer later in life, but that would entail really knowing how to operate a computer.) The kids I'm working with are great, though, and the event should be quite fantastic (fingers crossed).

Lastly, swim. (Any excuse to post a picture of Aaron Peirsol is a good one.) I am one of Frontier's JV coaches and am really having good times with my kids, or "guppies" as we refer to them. We just had our second meet, and it is rewarding to see the kids improve and to watch them get excited about their progress. We swim against Liberty next week, though, which will more than likely be a blowout and will burst their bubbles, but it's good to knock kids down once in awhile-it prepares them for the real world. This season's coaching experience has really brought me a new appreciation of my dad and the program he has built at Liberty, and I hope that I can inject some of that at Frontier. It makes me laugh that I am the strict disciplinarian at my new school, though, as I was the "easy coach" at Liberty (not Mary Kay Leteourneau easy).

My "50 books in 2009" goal continues, though slowly, but I'll catch up over Spring Break. #6 was The Buccaneers by Edith Wharton, about American girls who travel to England to find love; #7 was The Lost Continent by Bill Bryson, a non-fiction piece about an American (himself) who lived in England for 20 years and came back to the good ol' U.S.A. to travel via automobile to discover and explore the homeland; and #8 was Can't Wait to Get to Heaven by Fannie Flagg (author of books such as Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistlestop Cafe). I have read most of her books and have loved every one. She writes in a very honest and candid style about slices of real American life, and I recommend her to anyone who is looking to distract themselves from the hustle and bustle of the world. Of the three, Bill Bryson's was my favorite. I laughed out loud throughout, and I am definitely looking forward to reading more of him.

I KNEW it wasn't just me!

Although the local paper usually is not my source for current events (it's all about cnn.com and FARK, baby), I tend to enjoy Lois Henry, and her article about the women in Bakersfield getting the "short end of the dating stick" rang oh-so-true. Henceforth, I'll be spending my weekends on the green. (Either that sounds like I plan to get high a lot, or I just spend too much time around teenagers. Hmmm...)

To all the Presidents I've loved before...

Big ups to my personal favorites: Thomas Jefferson and Harry S Truman. The attached audio is by Mike Birbiglia, in honor of our 43rd. I don't care if you are Republican, Democrat, Libertarian, Anarchist, Green Party, whatever; it is hilarious.

5. I now want to see a Scarlett Johansson movie. Questionable.

I have always enjoyed period pieces in regards to movies and books, and Girl with a Pearl Earring was no different. One of my favorite classes in college was European history, with an emphasis on the Dutch (gold star to Dr. Rink!), and this book reawakened my interest in the land of windmills and wooden shoes. It is historical fiction, creating a backstory for the girl in the portrait and the artist, Vermeer, and it is simplistically lovely. I have the painting hanging in my front room (surprise, surprise) and I now have a story-albeit one entirely contrived-that gives the girl some soul.

In globetrotting news, I have decided my next European rendezvous will include Holland and Denmark. Learn some more history, tiptoe through the tulips, get in touch with my family roots, and see where the future of America is headed if we continue with Obama's plans for socialization. Hurray for a nation of dependents!